Speak to me

Songs have a way of speaking to you in ways that spoken words just can't sometimes. I've been freaking out lately about my life, and after a really inspiring message on Sunday, I've (mostly) relaxed. My pastor was texting me and encouraging me, and right after I read his texts, Kirk Franklin's song 'My Life is in Your Hands' came on Pandora. I'd asked God for a word this morning, some type of encouragement just to let me know he was there with me and he had my back, and some direction on what I'm supposed to be doing. He answered my prayers! It's great when you can count on somebody to be true to their word. He said he's a present help in trouble, and he proved himself again. It seems small, but it's these small moments that help move me in the right direction.

Reaally long post coming on overdosing on church.

Mhm..

I’m back at school. Freshmen are mad hype. Seniors are even worse. Is it May yet?

I straightened my hair. Everybody’s saying it’s cute. Is that a hint that I should leave the fro alone? But I wanna go back to my “naturally curly hair.” L

It’s not a good look to play “never have I ever” with people who you don’t really care to know their business, and neither do you want them to know yours.

I want school to start so I can get to work. But in two weeks, I will be begging for a break.

To my friend and former burgeoning cuddle buddy, Diesel: I miss you, why did you have to get a girlfriend?

It's a little cloudy

So I just finished watching the movie Juno. I’d refused to watch it before out of silent protest. If a black girl gets pregnant, it’s the same old story of an irresponsible slutty hoodrat having kids to stay on welfare or WIC. But a white girl does it and she gets an Oscar nomination. However, after watching it, I see why it won an Oscar. It was very well-written and acted. The subtleties and themes could probably make a nice little paper, if I actually wrote papers. There’s a reason I’m an accounting major. Watching movies like that makes me wish I could verbalize my thoughts in an eloquent manner. Or should I say, verbalize them quickly in an eloquent manner. I can come up with great arguments, but I need a lot of time to get them together. I have passed classes with flying colors after failing tests because of my superb papers (exhibit A of grade inflation). I feel like I could have a lot to say, but I need to practice getting my thoughts out of my head. There’s a line in that same song I talked about in the last post (Elevator Music by Othello) that says “responsibilities rest on the tongues of the educated mind, now accountable to verbalize truth.” Those words may not be completely right, but the gist of what he’s saying is that if you have knowledge, you should share that with someone who doesn’t have it and try to help them out. I get these vibes from people and I see inconsistencies and flaws in explanations, but many times, I can’t quite put my finger on it. But when I finally do get it, it’s even better than that proverbial light bulb. It’s that feeling you get when the sun finally breaks through the clouds after you’ve been secretly pleading with it all day to come out because you knew that the day would be absolutely perfect if it would just shine as brightly as you knew it could. So until I get that feeling, I keep tweaking my thoughts, keeping in mind that the hard work will be worth it when the cloud is finally lifted from my mind.